She didn’t even know how powerful the words were…
August 6, 2015 § Leave a comment
The past couple of weeks I have been joining my very good friend to go see a personal trainer.
There is a whole back story about how I knew this trainer years ago. She is the reason I started my love affair with yoga and eventually started teaching.
10 years ago after Arianna was diagnosed I struggled emotionally in ways that I choose to try to forget. The impact of learning that your child is “different”, will struggle and that there’s not much you can do about it is devastating. (Although 10 years later I feel completely different and believe her diagnosis/disability has been a gift for us all to learn many things and mostly she brings conatant joy!) In the “dark days” I couldn’t relax. I had so many emotions, fear, anger, anxiety – the list goes on. I kept seeking relief through exercise – I ran – I ran like I was being chased by a tiger! And while I was running if no one was around I would scream – primal screams! It felt good but winter came quickly and I had to find a new outlet. I was tired and thought I would try yoga because “it would be easy, right?” HA!! Enter the amazing trainer – who is also an amazing yoga teacher. I had entered power yoga. We must have done 100 Sun Salutations that first day. I had to pay attention to keep the flow, I had to abandon my thoughts to stay on pace with the class and listen – “inhale, exhale…” Oh yeah and it made me breathe – I think I had been holding my breath for months! At the end of the first class we of course ended with shirvasana and for the first time ever since “D day” I relaxed. The minute I did, lying there in a pile of sweat on a borrowed mat, I began to cry! In front of everyone the tears just kept rolling down my face – I had found my release.
It wasn’t long before I practiced yoga all the time and pursued my certification. I had left teaching at the school and found a way to combine my two passions – special education and yoga. I created a business called yoga adaptations and taught yoga to people with a multitude of disabilities. It was an amazing experience.
Three years later, I got a call from my current job. They were looking for a Special Edication Teacher. With the stress of the new job my yoga business and practice quickly became a thing of the past.
Fast forward to three weeks ago. At the personal trainers home and it is the same teacher that ignited my passion 10 years earlier. We work out, she kicks our butts, “lift, push, slow down, hold!” And then she ends our session finally with shirvasana. Well don’t ya know …. Total PTSD moment! All of those emotions I had felt that first day came rushing back. Her voice, my breathing, … the release. Again, flood gates opened. I shared my story with her.
I was there again last night – I was extremely silly. I just was giggling about everything, especially my lack of coordination! But I tried to focus, I listened and even in my silliest moment I heard her words. They resonated in a way she didn’t even intend. They had become the lessons I have learned over the years – the lessons taught to me from our journey as a family.
“When you get to the top, pause”
Isn’t that powerful? Really we need to stop and pause and realize the beauty of our kids successes no matter how big or small. We need to bask in it, take it in because if we don’t we are onto the next struggle in a blink!
Enough said really!
“Inhale and open up through your heart.”
Oh I just love that one. It just makes me think of opening my heart to the wonderful people in my life and breathing in all the beauty of the blessings around me.
To this very special woman – thank you!
You give your heart and soul to us each week. You make me laugh, cry, and heal. And, you speak powerful words without realizing! I am blessed to know you again. Thank you for helping me reconnect with my yoga and with myself!